Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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