You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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