That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
