I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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