so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Naked. naked and bneed help.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
