I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
We're too hungover to prance.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize