Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Randomize
