I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize