I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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