is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
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Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
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Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
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