i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
