Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
