i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
