Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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