How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.