Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
