I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I want to be your penis for a week.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
