I must be too annoying 4 u.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Let's paint friendship bongs
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Randomize
