Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I thidmdmk you'gre a special person

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): I thidmdmk you'gre a special person http://tfl.nu/mmrm
  Replies (1) Good night (1314) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train. http://tfl.nu/ldtk
  Replies (39) Good night (619) Bad night (2192)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time. http://tfl.nu/39ft
  Replies (28) Good night (1952) Bad night (3129)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.

  (1-443): View more from Maryland

  Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain. (1-443): Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one. http://tfl.nu/00ky
  Replies (38) Good night (3867) Bad night (1514)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster. http://tfl.nu/69p8
  Replies (34) Good night (3518) Bad night (2341)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker. http://tfl.nu/yz4c
  Replies (12) Good night (920) Bad night (2032)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (641): I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. http://tfl.nu/90tm
  Replies (18) Good night (1152) Bad night (1326)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (772): So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me. http://tfl.nu/5rwa
  Replies (12) Good night (3435) Bad night (1209)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"... http://tfl.nu/sfou
  Replies (6) Good night (1851) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree). http://tfl.nu/fkun
  Replies (7) Good night (964) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo. http://tfl.nu/co0z
  Replies (2) Good night (770) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls? (816): Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do. http://tfl.nu/ewbx
  Replies (2) Good night (1154) Bad night (299)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Still. Make it happen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both" (1-215): Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen. (1-215): Still. Make it happen http://tfl.nu/b78c
  Replies (3) Good night (669) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere. http://tfl.nu/68wk
  Replies (0) Good night (504) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral http://tfl.nu/o1j6
  Replies (0) Good night (424) Bad night (293)

Randomize