Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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