Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
