I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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