dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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