You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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