Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
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He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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