What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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