DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
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he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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