when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
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