Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
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