He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize