Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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