Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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