mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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