she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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