I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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