Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
