When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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