You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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