your room smells of hookers.
And success
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize