i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
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