ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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