Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
it hurts more in the daytime
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.