Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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