Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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