Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
