I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize