actually, I'm a sock model
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
