I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
