i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
