K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize