Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he told me I talked like a deaf person
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She told me I should be a condom model.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
