I feel like abortions should bother me more
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Randomize
